No asshole, I didn't see "The Game" last night...

I am becoming increasingly pissed-off with these testosterone soaked idiots who spend their precious evening time watching a bunch a multi-bazillion-aires throwing or hitting a fucking ball for three hours. If that isn’t bad enough, they have to come in to work the next day and waste even more precious time talking about “The Game”. They need to discuss who won and lost, who made an error, which coach made a wrong move, etc. Who gives a shit?!?

Baseball is the most boring invention of all time, and anyone who disagrees probably also enjoys watching NASCAR. Somebody throws a ball. Someone hits it, or they don’t. Someone catches it, or they don’t. Someone runs around a diamond, or they don’t. They score, or they don’t. Then someone smacks their ass, someone else sells peanuts, and some 80 year old geriatric spends a little while talking about glory days gone by. Cut to a few beer commercials, and the game is over. Whoop-de-fucking-doo!!

Football? All you demented frigging homosexuals out there who use tackling as an socially acceptable alternative to televised ass-ramming need to get a goddamned grip. This sport takes a bunch of obese, steroid soaked, undereducated psychopaths and gives them a ball made out of the skin of a dead animal. They then proceed to try and move this ball in ten-yard increments while the other team tries their very best to kill the person holding the ball. Then some cheerleaders (which are only there as a heterosexual subterfuge) bounce and sing a little bit, cut to a few beer commercials, and the game is over.

NASCAR?? FUCKING NASCAR IS A SPORT? A bunch of small men with even smaller dicks get into brightly painted cars with oversized engines and proceed to drive miles and miles in a complete circle? And even more insane is the fact that people show up and stare at this shit! They love it so much they put stickers on their cars and pick favorite drivers. These people should stick to watching the clothes go around and around in a washing machine – it’s more educational at least.

Why do we as a society felt he need to still put on these “games” like a bunch of ancient Romans? As a child, I’m sure these help build team skills and help you make friends, but there reaches a point where you have to grow the fuck up, and stop crying when billionaire Roger Clemens doesn’t throw at least 20 strikes in a night. IT DOESN’T MATTER!! Spend this time with your kids, your family, washing the dog. ANYTHING that contributes to society!
On a final note, props to the NHL for giving up. I think we should all give up. Permanently.